How Your Marriage Can Thrive

As Anthony Robbins shares, love is not enough to sustain a passionate relationship. You can get love from many different people. For intimate relationships, polarity is key.

Polarity, the dance between masculine and feminine energy, is what gives passion and will sustain a relationship so that it thrives long term.

As Eban Pagan often says, attraction is not a choice. If you are at the mall you will notice many people you find attractive, it is automatic. (Attraction is why you first noticed the person you married). But what sustains attraction and makes it grow along with polarity is character. Develop high character and you will be more attractive to your husband or wife.

Understanding this dance between energies is essential to understanding your spouse and your relationship. In turn, you need to meet your spouse’s needs, but you need to do so the way they need them met, i.e. in accordance with their energy.

For instance, if you give your wife a card that expresses your love for her, she will be very moved. Why? Feminine energy thrives on praise and attention. If you were to give your husband a card he would not be moved in the same manner. Why? Because men don’t thrive on praise. Men thrive on challenge, on accomplishing a goal.

Progress is happiness. Men crave the freedom to pursue an outcome. If you tell him to take out the trash he will resist because you are using masculine energy like a boss. If you ask him for help with a problem he will step up because it is a chance to solve a problem.

As Barbara De Angelis shares, for women 90% of foreplay is from the neck up. Again, the need is for affection and assurance and security. As you express your love for her she will light up.

For women, your husband would not respond to the same approach. This is not because he is not in touch with his feelings. It is because men don’t thrive on praise, so he can’t thrive by being in touch with his feelings, it simply is not who he is at his core.

Remember, we all have masculine and feminine energy. You are 90% more one than the other. This has nothing to do with being macho, with feminism, or with cultural roles about which sex does a better job at what. It is about the heart of passion and romance.

If passion is not there it is because the polarity has been lost. There has to be masculine and feminine energy, a pursuer and one being pursued, along with high character. Mix these together and your relationship can’t help but thrive.